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The Feminine Slant
Korean Dating Rules Include Some Mind Reading
Written by Eunjoo Byun
So: what do Korean women want? What we want is that not telling you what we want.Why can’t you just know? We want you to read our mind so we don t have to tell you every single thing we want. Yes, I know it is frustrating and we always say guys are stupid. But that is what girls want. Because we don’t want to ask things ﬁrst: Will you send me a message? Will you call me tonight? Will you kiss me? Will you spend tonight with me? or Will you buy me that ring?
Not all, but many Korean girls pretend innocence in front of guys. So even if they want to kiss you, they won t. They would rather wait till you kiss her. Not to mention spending the night. So, you should know how to play this game. Do you really think that your girlfriend wants you to protect her that much? I don t think so. Just hold her hand and kiss her deep even in public! There are some guys who are proud of themselves for protecting their girlfriends. Protecting means they never move on to the next step for months. Your girlfriend must be dying to go on to the next step. Girls don’t want to ask things like that. And it is also about pride. Moving on to the next step is the guys job. The girls job is being shy. I mean pretending we are shy. Especially regarding spending the night, girls should pretend like we didn t expect this and say no at least once. Basically, Korean girls are just not supposed to be horny, at least, in the begging sense. You can t really ﬁnd a girl like Samantha from Sex and the City. But after some time, you never know how she will turn out to be. To know better, watch some Japanese porn. Japan shares some common cultural aspect with Korea. It is an extreme example, though.
You say you don’t know how to read a girl’s mind? Start by listening to her carefully and paying atten- tion to her. Then you will get some clues. Is an anniversary coming? You don’t know what to get? Buy things she was looking at or things she mentioned before. Yon can’t remember? Then just get a BIG diamond!
Sometimes a girl might ask you ﬁrst. You should try to do what- ever she asks you to do. Don’t humiliate her. It is about a girl’s pride. Try to keep her pride and improve your skills to read girls minds. So you can play this game little bit better!
Girls, Don't Be Stupid To Be Loyal
Written by Eunjoo Byun
Every guy wants a loyal girl friend but are THEY loyal? or do they deserve a loyal girl friend? Maybe some do but I find that most of the times if girls are loyal, guys naturally think that s how it should be rather than appreciating. Guys, if you want a loyal girl friend, you have to be loyal ALSO.
Girls, you never know when this guys is going to turn into a selfish ass. You should always have your guard up. Do not give all of your hearts to him. If you do, you will eventually find yourself being stupid and pathetic. Or at least you should be able to identify those guys deserve your love. Usually you think you did identify them but a lot of times, you didn t. Guys may appreciate your loyalty in the beginning for like a second but then they think they have it so their stupid lust of conquest is going off to others. This is what guys are. It s really funny that every single guy thinks they are different than others but they really ARE THE SAME.
So, what s the point of being loyal? Keep your guy friends around you. Being in a relationship doesn t mean that you can t have guy friends. So keep them and enjoy their attention. Attention isn t bad thing. When you are focusing only on your boy friend you are more likely to be disappointed and that leads to dramas which guys hate. So keep your guy friends enjoying their attention then you will be distracted and there will be less chance to create dramas. That is win-win situation.
Another thing, do not swallow your pride. Even when you think you are losing the love of your life. Because if he is really the love of your life then no matter what, he will come back to you. Just don t be pathetic to beg him to come back or something. When you beg, suddenly your love becomes shame. You won t even be able to forgive yourself later. When you realize that you were begging the huge asshole to come back. Even if he comes back, he s not going to be a new person. Like I said, he is one of the guys that are THE SAME.
Do not ever be head over heels. Every guy will eventually look for another thing to conquer again. But giving all your love and being loyal to him will only make it even sooner. Don t be stupid to be loyal and guys shouldn t expect us to be, just like they are not.
Girls, If You Want To Be Loved, Be a Bitch
Written by Eunjoo Byun
Girls, if you want to be loved, be a bitch! You are a really nice girl, but you don’t have a boy friend. More importantly, your biatch girlfriend has one. You don’t know what is wrong with you, do you? Let me tell you. You are a really nice girl! That’s what’s wrong with you. Girls need to be a little difficult. Guys always say they like “pretty” and “nice” girls but what they really like is sexy biatch. If you agree with him all the time, putting your opinion aside, and always treating him nice, he will get bored. He will think YOU are boring. Men want something sparking a relationship. Even fighting will make the relationship more exciting. They will only think that you are a really nice person. Yeah, just a person not a girlfriend! Guys say, especially Korean guys, that they want a girl that obeys him. If you really do obey him, he won’t treat you like his girlfriend but like his maid. So you should be a little difficult. Then he will be full of lust for conquest. Being difficult is a good start but another thing to do is don’t look after him but make him look after you. You may want to treat him very nicely, do whatever he asks you to do, and look after him all the time… but that’s not what girlfriends do. That’s what MOMMIES do! You should make him look after you. He will like that better because guys like to feel that they protect you and take care of you. If YOU take care of him, they think you are fine and don’t need them rather than appreciating your effort. They might even look for someone else to take care of. You put in all your effort and cannot see that happening, right?
Here’s a big one--don’t go Dutch. Yeah, you feel bad that he spends lots of money on you. Show him and tell him how much you appreciate everything but do not pay for it yourself. If you buy him dinner, drinks, clothes, and even give taxi money he will think that you are his very nice and comfortable friend, not his girlfriend. You shouldn’t try to give so much to him. Girls are not supposed to do that. What we are supposed to do is “receive.”
Remember, all the guys have desire for conquest. Let them have it. You shouldn’t give yourself to them saying “I’m yours” even before they conquer you. Guys say they hate biatch girls. But there are only three types of guys saying that: those who got dumped by biatch and those who are hitting on a biatch and failing miserably, and lastly, those who lack the balls to try and hit on a biatch. So Girls, if you want to be loved, be a big bitch!
Love and Money
Written by Eunjoo Byun
Sometimes money isn’t so important to be in love with someone. But to maintain the relationship, money is as important as love. The thing is, it is really hard to find someone in the middle. Some guys have lots of love but no money, while some guys have lots of money but no love. I had some personal experience with a guy who had lots of love but no money. I realized now it was only possible because I was young. He didn’t have taxi money so when he wanted to see me he rode his bike all the way to my house and when the bus stops running we walked home together holding hands. I thought it was really cute and sweet. But if I date a guy like this now, I don’t think I can be with him for to long.
In the beginning, it would be cute “for short time” but the reality many girls wear high heels and never want to walk a long time in pain. Whenever you want to take a taxi and go home, he says he will walk home with you and you cannot say no to him unless you want to hurt his pride. It is really uncomfortable. And when you eat out with your sweet boy friend, you also don’t feel comfortable worrying about his finances or you eat at a dollar Kimbab place while your friends are eating out with their boy friends at a fancy restaurant. But this kind of guys treats you very well because they know what they are. They give you lots of attention and love and try to spend time with you. Guys with money but no love are tricky. You are very comfortable financially and hardly worry about spending money on food and transportation, even get a nice present. But the thing is these kind of guys tend to treat you like shit after some time. They also know what they are. They know what they are providing for you. So they think you should be grateful and feel lucky to date a guy like them. They think giving you stuff and spending money on you is enough attention whenever you really want to feel loved and get attention; even little things like messages or calls.
So you complain that you don’t get much attention then they get upset with you for the reason you don’t appreciate whatever they buy for you, which is not true. You could be really comfortable but would be longing for the love and attention that poor guys can give you. What should we do? The poor don’t have money but give you genuine love while the rich have money and try to buy your love. You have to find someone in the middle. Not so poor but not so rich. You don’t have to be spoiled but be comfortable with enough attention. Why is this simple thing so hard to find and complicated? It’s even easier to find the bad combination of these two; poor and no loving qualities. Guys who have these horrible characteristics don’t even try to get a girl friend! It could ruin someone’s life! We are only hoping to find someone normal (for us). You have any opinions or comments?
Two Faced Guys
Written by Eunjoo Byun
There are not only two-faced bitches but also two-faced jerk guys. How come a guy’s attitude toward his girlfriend changes so much? Guys become so different than they were at the beginning of the relationship. Every single guy changes, regardless of how much they love their girls. It’s just a matter of time or a matter of degree. How fake they are!
He used to send you thousands of messages, appreciate you, paid a lot of attention to you, spend a lot of time with you, and you were the most important thing to him. Suddenly one day you realize that you are lonely. Thousands of messages decrease to hundreds to ten to five to nothing. And now he takes everything for granted. He doesn’t see how much effort you put in to see him, putting everything aside just for him. Despite it all, he still takes everything for granted. Now his work comes before you or his friends come before you. He doesn’t even hug you or kiss you, and this makes you feel lonely, even lonelier than single girls. How miserable and pathetic is that?
So whenever girls complain about being neglected, guys always say girls are too dramatic or crazy. We are not dramatic or crazy. Guys, you are the one who changed. We loved you, not the jerk side of you that we see today, but the sweet you that won my heart. If we knew that you were going to be jerk, we wouldn’t have fallen in love with you in the first place. You can’t say we are dramatic or crazy and even if we are, it’s because of you. You caused all the drama and craziness. Who wouldn’t go crazy? When people realize that the person they love is not the person they fell in love with, a little craziness ensues. The schmuck is a completely different person compared to the beginning of the relationship. How can you expect us to love you still and accept everything? Girls also know that it won’t be like it was in the beginning but still, you should be kind of like the guy we fell in love with. Don’t you think?
I personally hate playing games in relationship but I do think it is necessary when guys become jerks. They also need to realize again how important their girlfriends are and how much they need them. Girls, be a good player, never lose the game. Don’t be pathetic. You deserve a better man than the jerk. And guys, seriously, can’t you be just a little bit more attentive? Please…